What if all of the things in life you didn't like or weren't satisfied with could just be sent back for a full refund? If that were true I wonder what I'd get back from her? I'd wonder what all of the hearts I'd crushed would get back from me? I'd wonder who would be in charge of making sure the postage was paid for all of our happiness and pain? Do you think it could all fit in one of those little USPS trucks or would we need one of those daisy chained 18 Wheelers?

As much as it feels like I loose in situations I know that I'm winning through experience.

When she was there...

I felt strong

I had a sense of purpose

A reason to be

Someone to be there for under any an all conditions

A champion

A friend

A lover

When she left...

I felt weak

Without purpose

Reasonless

A complete failure

Now that she's gone...

I feel strong

I have a sense of purpose

A reason to be

Someone to be there for under any an all conditions

A champion

A friend

A lover

I just never realized that someone could be me.

The past couple of days I've been thinking about my life and how things are going to change. For anyone who doesn't know I'm going to teacher training to be a Bikram yoga instructor. Over the past few months I've done a lot to set the stage and be ready in as many ways possible. Financially it is a big commitment as I will have to keep things running back at home while I am away at training which lasts 9 weeks. There is so much to think about: money, health insurance, rent ... the list goes on. The big one is the issue of what I'm going to do for work when I get back?

Make a decision and then tell me what comes next? Well you actually have to act on it. Yesterday I decide to sign up on match.com, because, you know I'm going to find my soul mate. Well actually I was just trying to take some action so I don't end up like a little whining puppy dog crawling back to my X.

I've finally done it. I've gone over to the dark side...

http://www.match.com/profile/showprofile.aspx?ortp=1&TP=U&uid=OzE22I/lgAHfqnbbgemXeQ==&lid=21

My profile sucks. What is even worse is that trying to find someone is hard. What the hell can you tell from a crappy picture someone took of themselves?

Fairy tales happen on match.com...The whole thing leaves me with a bad taste in my mouth.