Will

I really can’t say how many times my mountain biker friends have suggested that my lack of performance on the bike is due to a lack of will. I find this interesting because I definitely push myself, but it’s made me reflect more and more on the subject…

While will can get you skill it’s not the same thing. People with a lot of skill forget what it’s like to not have any skill. I’ve been riding mountain bikes for just over 4 years. I’ve gone from being barely able to navigate small rocks to riding down some pretty gnarly shit. There have been a lot of thoughts and emotions in between but a lack of will is definitely not a limiting factor.

So whenever my friends have suggested that it’s a lack of determination I’ve often barked back “Yeah whatever”. Anger aside I couldn’t help but think “I’m seriously giving everything I have here and I’m still failing. Why?!?”

It’s just not time.

Let me say that again…

It’s just not time.

In the program we have a saying TIME = Things I Must Earn

So it’s not just about will. Will is important but if it was just about will I would have had everything long ago. If anything it’s about the removal of will and movement into acceptance. Will is just a refusal to accept reality. Don’t get me wrong it has it’s place in each of our lives but it’s generally useless outside of life or death situations. Pushing yourself isn’t always the answer sometimes pushing yourself means doing nothing.

I’ve learned a lot over the past few years with respect to the body, mind and spirit. It’s not just about will and determination. There is some other thing that I don’t have a word for but it’s there…